Masthead header

How does your personality type deal with relationships?

Screen Shot 2016-01-18 at 9.18.42 PMFor the past few years, I’ve been pretty obsessed with Myers-Briggs personality type. The more I learn about it, the more I’m convinced that understanding it is a complete game-changer in terms of how to interact with people – friends, coworkers, family, and of course, Sven. There’s a ton of information about Myers-Briggs on the internet, so I won’t rehash it all here, but I do believe that each person is one of the 16 types, and that type is fundamental to who a person is and does not change.

Critics of Myers-Briggs say that it’s impossible to pigeonhole the human population into 16 categories, but in my opinion, there are a lot of factors that make each of us individuals, and Myers-Briggs is only one. Two ENFJs can have completely different personalities, which may be based on their upbringing, life experience, age, learned behaviors, and a number of other factors. But Myers-Briggs simply theorizes – and I’m paraphrasing here – that all ENFJs are motivated/discouraged by the same factors, perceive the world and process information similarly. Based on my own personal study of personality type, I find that this is definitely true and has helped me better communicate with and understand the motivations and perceptions of people around me. It’s also helped me understand how people perceive me, and to find common ground with people whose motivations or priorities may be different than mine.

One other thing I would say is a very common misconception of Myers-Briggs is that people take each letter individually and literally (Extrovert vs. Introvert; Sensor vs. INtuitive; Thinker vs. Feeler; Perceiver vs. Judger). In actuality, Myers-Briggs type is more about how the combinations of letters manifest themselves. For example, four subcategories of Myers-Briggs are NT, SJ, SP, and NF. I’ll spare you the details, but I just wanted to point out that there’s more to it than deciding which letter you think sounds the most like you just based on the word it stands for. If you’re curious, take the test here: Results are most accurate when you answer based on your natural tendency and not learned behaviors. For example, I like to sleep in, but I wake up at 6am for work every day because I have to. So, if the test asked, “I am an early riser.” I would put “No” even though I do rise early!

So now that I’ve bored you, here is the fun part: I’m sharing a couple of fun posts I found on the internet about personality type and relationships. First is how each Myers-Briggs personality type likes to fall in love. Second is the top relationship deal-breakers for each type. Keep in mind these posts are written by a 24-year old blogger, Heidi Priebe, who is a self-proclaimed Myers-Briggs expert, so this is definitely more for fun than gospel. However, I did find these both to be true for me (ENTP) and Sven (INTJ).

How Each Myers-Briggs Personality Type Likes to Fall in Love

(More details for each type can be found in the link above)

ENFP – Intensely, excitedly and passionately

INFP – Grandly, deeply and romantically

INFJ – Slowly, guardedly and cautiously

ENFJ – Passionately, considerately and deeply

INTJ – Slowly, deliberately and secretly

ENTJ – Evenly, guardedly and safely

INTP – Cautiously, curiously and sparingly

ENTP – Curiously, quickly and obsessively

ISTJ – Steadily, patiently and quietly

ESTJ – Purposefully, deliberately and decisively

ISTP – Off-handedly, unintentionally and conveniently

ESTP – Boldly, brashly and assertively

ISFJ – Observantly, patiently and open-heartedly

ESFJ – Passionately, conventionally and considerately

ISFP – Carefully, romantically and serendipitously

ESFP – Openly, affectionately and enthusiastically

The Top Relationship Dealbreaker for Each Myers-Briggs Personality Type

(More details for each type can be found in the link above)

ENFP – Having limits placed on their freedom

INFP – Being closed-minded

INFJ – Feeling unable to fully trust their partner

ENFJ – Feeling unneeded

INTJ – Dishonesty

ENTJ – Disloyalty

INTP – A partner who cannot think critically

ENTP – Boredom

ISTJ – Deviance from their personal system of values

ESTJ – Inconsistency

ISTP – Insecurity

ESTP – Dormancy

ISFJ – Insensitivity

ESFJ – Unwillingness to commit

ISFP – Being unable to express their true selves

ESFP – Having limits placed on their socializing

Share your personality type with me and whether or not you thought these descriptions were accurate for you!


Screen Shot 2015-07-26 at 10.40.29 PM

Subscribe to my blog and receive an email only when new posts are added!

Follow me on Twitter and Facebook!

Go back to My So-Called Perfect Marriage Homepage



Your email is never published or shared.