Sven and I could not be more different when it comes to our argument styles: I have a sharp tongue, am prone to yelling, and calm down almost as quickly as I blow up. I get over it quickly. On the other hand, Sven prefers to argue with calm, cryptic assertions, if not simply deafening silence. He can go for days without even telling me why he’s mad, which causes me to yell even more, which causes him to prolong his silence.
If Sven is the one that’s mad at me, a typical fight will go something like this:
Sven: There is no point arguing with you because you will just run all over me with your articulate arguments, and I’m not able to articulate myself as quickly as you are to fight back.
Me: You’re making an assumption without us even having a discussion, why don’t you just try having a conversation with me?
Sven: I know how you are.
Me: Why are you even mad at me?
Me: WHAT DID I DO?! TELL ME! YOU’RE NOT BEING FAIR!
Eventually (approximately 2.35 days later), this will blow over.
If I’m the one that’s mad at Sven, a typical fight will go something like this:
Me: You’re being an asshole.
Sven: I’m not an asshole, I love you. (Pins me down and tickles me so I am forced to laugh hysterically.)
Me: That’s not fair! You don’t let me tickle you when you’re mad at me…ok, let’s cuddle. (Cuddling ensues.)
I have nothing profound to say here. (Do I ever?) But if you’re looking for something more profound, you can read my old post about love languages, or this book. Sven and I are basically just a typical, bickering “old” married couple. We’re frustratingly different from each other to the point where we want to smack each other senseless when we argue. (Not in a Ray Rice kind of way.) (Too soon?) But in the end, love and cuddling always win.